Why did the police arrest the turkey?
? They suspected it of fowl play.

 

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
? Pilgrims

 

Why do turkeys always go, "gobble, gobble"?
? Because they never learned good table manners!

 

What key has legs and can't open doors?
? A Turkey

 

Why did Johnny get such low grades after Thanksgiving?
? Because everything is marked down after the holidays

 

What has feathers and webbed feet?
? A turkey wearing scuba gear

 

How can you send a turkey through the post office?
? Bird class mail

 

What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
? He got the stuffing knocked out of him

 

Why did the turkey cross the road?
? It was the chicken's day off

 

Why was the turkey the drummer in the band?
? Because he had the drumsticks

 

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Waddle
Waddle who?
? Waddle I do if you don't open the door?

 

What do you call a dumb gobbler?
? A jerky turkey

 

What sound does a space turkey make?
? Hubble, hubble, hubble

 

What do you call a gobbler who thinks he knows everything?
? A smirky turkey

 

Why did the man invest in feathers?
? He heard the stock market was going down

 

What kind of vegetable would you like tonight?
? Beets me

 

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
? Plymouth Rock.

 

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
? Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.

 

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
? Yes, a building can't jump at all!

 

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
? Because they use such fowl language.

 

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
? The Turkey.



 

Where did the first corn come from?
? The stalk brought it.

 

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
? The outside.